NENGO 327年12月2日 6:37 PM - 29 Days Until Culmination
After many hours of searching, the party manages to locate all the missing pieces of the statue. Here is a rundown of their stats:
TRITHAL (LV 32 DIVINE WIND; 131/131 HP; 128/128 SP; 11484 EXP)
AXEM (LV 30 STONE PILLAR; 113/113 HP; 110/110 SP; 10033 EXP)
THRAX (LV 34 HELL-FIRE; 109/109 HP; 164/164 SP; 12907 EXP)
Danika (LV 33 FOREST NINJA, CLASS III; 112/112 HP; 110/110 SP; 9801 EXP)
Anri (LV 32 ICE FLAME; 107/107 HP; 106/106 SP; 10955 EXP)
Adeth (LV 26 PALADIN; 80/80 HP; 58/58 SP; 5156 EXP)
Kuta (LV 35 RED CRYSTAL; 110/110 HP; 118/118 SP; 11722 EXP)
Elric (LV 31 LIGHTENING WIZARD; 115/115 HP; 262/262 SP; 8901 EXP)
Jarsar (LV 44 WIND; 152/1152 HP; 207/207 SP; 13244 EXP)
Xaklafor (LV 62 AQUATIC WAVE; 236/239 HP; 425/425 SP; 26987 EXP)
Veiko (LV 37 GRYNAK CAPTAIN; 124/124 HP; 91/91 SP; 9899 EXP)
Vash (LV 34 GRYNAK CAPTAIN; 109/109 HP; 77/77 SP; 8656 EXP)
For the past hour, while everyone was recovering from their injuries and restoring their lost HP and SP, the party has been staring at the odd silver pieces trying to figure out how they go together. Now that the sun is setting and daylight is almost gone, the most-disciplined minds of the party take to the task of figuring out the puzzle.
TRITHAL: "Okay... this has got to fit together somehow."
Danika: "Yeah, but how? None of these pieces make any sense at all!"
Kuta: "Well, let's start by finding the base of the statue. It should be the one with the biggest flat side."
Once the base of the statue was finally located and fitted into place, the rest of the party joined in and helped with the assembly. About 2 hours passed, and some torches were found to provide light. Once the statue was complete, the party stood back in awe...
Anri: "Wow..."
Elric: "Holy shit!!"
Adeth: "Woah! This is like, the most trippy thing I've seen in more than 400 years!"
AXEM: "What is it?"
THRAX: "It looks like Jesus... smoking from a huge bong!"
everyone: "woah...."
Kuta: "Okay then, now that we have this thing put together, how do we open the entrance to the labyrinth?"
TRITHAL: "Where the hell is Smaug?"
THRAX: "I don't know but, he better show himself soon. We don't have time to bullshit around."
Soon afterward, the echoing voice of the stealthy dragon could be heard in the darkness, bouncing off of the walls and buildings surrounding the party. A'la the same method from Episode 44, TRITHAL stands in the middle of the area with his eyes glowing blue... then he raises his right hand straight up into the air... then about 3 1/2 seconds later he clenches his hand shut, then Smaug materializes in mid-air with TRITHAL's hand around his neck. After Smaug stops squirming, TRITHAL body-slams him on the ground.
Smaug: "Ouch, you fucker of mothers!"
THRAX: "Ok, Smaug. We have this statue put together. How are we supposed to open the entrance to the labyrinth?"
Smaug: "Oh, excellent! Finally reassembled the statue is. Now, what's this you speak about an entrance to the labyrinth?"
AXEM: "It's the whole reason why we came all the way out here and put this stupid thing together! We need to get to the gates of hell, and you have an entrance to the labyrinth that will take us there!
Smaug: "Ah, well.... uh.... the entrance? An entrance there is.... but... how to open it I remember not."
everyone: "eauWHAA???"
THRAX: "Then why the hell did you have us spend all this time on this statue?! We're on a time schedule here! We don't have time to waste on stupid bullshit like this!"
Smaug: "Never said did I, that the statue would open the entrance. Looking for entertainment, I was. A prized family heirloom this statue is. Scattered throughout the grounds the pieces were, and by myself I could not find them all. Fun it was to watch you battle the demons and find the pieces."
TRITHAL: "Shit! Isn't there anything 'entertaining' in Okreman territory besides us? You people need DirecTV!"
Kuta: "Fine. You've had your fun. Now, do you know how to open the entrance or not?"
Smaug: "Uhh..... Almost 200 years has passed since last it was opened. A mantra and crystal, the one who opened it used."
THRAX: "Do you remember who it was, or the crystal that was used?"
Smaug: "Sworn to secrecy I was. Tell you I cannot."
TRITHAL: "Fuck this bullshit!"
TRITHAL walks through the darkness with a torch to the sealed entrance and studies the markings engraved on it. His eyes glowed blue as he studied the seal. Eventually he turned and called out to THRAX.
TRITHAL: "Hey goat-piss! Come here and look at this."
THRAX walks over to where TRITHAL is standing, by the sealed entrance to the labyrinth. TRITHAL points at a line Draconian characters carved into the stone and instructs THRAX to read it. THRAX holds up his torch and studies it, and stumbles through translating it to English:
THRAX: "Uh.... 'This entrance sealed by the bloodline of Xanthur. May those who defy it be called dumb-shits and be sodomized by gorillas.'"
A light chuckle erupted among the party after THRAX roughly translated the carvings. TRITHAL then instructs THRAX to read the carvings in the Draconian language.
THRAX: "Uh, 'Xanthurias Draconis Infernus--'"
As THRAX was reading the inscription, his amulet began to glow bright red accompanied with a sudden loud rumbling. The ground began to shake as the stone gateway into the Dark Labrynth started to crack and crumble to the ground. Once the seal was in pieces on the ground and the entrance was open, the remnants of the seal reassembled to form a Stone Dragon.
dragon: "THE SEAL OF XANTHUR HAS BEEN DISTURBED! PREPARE TO BE PUNISHED!"
Huge flames and various minions flow out of the now-open gateway and take battle stances in front of the Stone Dragon. The party likewise assumes their battle stances. Smaug has the look of utter shock and surprise on his face as he watches the battle unfold.
BATTLE MODE ON
TRITHAL (LV 32; 131/131 HP; 128/128 SP; 11484 EXP)
AXEM (LV 30; 113/113 HP; 110/110 SP; 10033 EXP)
THRAX (LV 34; 109/109 HP; 164/164 SP; 12907 EXP)
Danika (LV 33; 112/112 HP; 110/110 SP; 9801 EXP)
Anri (LV 32; 107/107 HP; 106/106 SP; 10955 EXP)
Adeth (LV 26; 80/80 HP; 58/58 SP; 5156 EXP)
Kuta (LV 35; 110/110 HP; 118/118 SP; 11722 EXP)
Elric (LV 31; 115/115 HP; 262/262 SP; 8901 EXP)
Jarsar (LV 44; 152/1152 HP; 207/207 SP; 13244 EXP)
Xaklafor (LV 62; 236/239 HP; 425/425 SP; 26987 EXP)
Veiko (LV 37; 124/124 HP; 91/91 SP; 9899 EXP)
Vash (LV 34; 109/109 HP; 77/77 SP; 8656 EXP)
As the party prepares to attack, THRAX turns to Smaug and says, "When this is over, I'm painting this stupid Jesus statue with your blood!"
Smaug begins to duck away into the shadows, as the Boss Fight ensues...
The Stone Dragon gets the first move and casts 'Stone Shower' All members lose 22 HP, except AXEM, who just stands there and laughs.
TRITHAL does a wind attack that rips off a popular copyrighted Anime series. The dragon minions are destroyed. No damage to Stone Dragon.
THRAX uses the Draconian Aura Crystal. His auric energy is enhanced until it takes on it's own physical form. The aura, a dragon that kinda looks like Thrax, begins an all-out assault on the Stone Dragon. THRAX uses 84 SP. Stone Dragon loses 946/3800 HP.
THRAX: "That's it?! I was hoping for an instant kill. Damn it!"
TRITHAL: "What the hell did you expect? Your draconian powers haven't been fully restored yet, and you only have the vaguest idea how to use that damn thing!"
THRAX: "....damn..."
It's now Danika's turn. She recites the Incantation of the Forest Gods. Suddenly, the barren rocky terrain is replaced by a dense forest. Several forest-dwelling spirits spring forth and attempt a melee attack on Stone Dragon. She uses 56 SP. Stone Dragon loses 1826/2854 HP.
AXEM: "Oh, hell YEAH!!"
THRAX: "Shut the hell up. You're even more useless in this fight than I am!"
AXEM runs off and calls his brother on his cell to complain about what bitches his party-mates are.
BATTLE MODE OFF: AXEM
Anri casts deep freeze. Stone Dragon is now a pile of froze boulders. No damage to Stone Dragon. Anri uses 18 SP.
Kuta uses RED CRYSTAL. Red energy radiates out of Kuta's body and is then projected to the dragon. The energy surrounds stone dragon and the enemy shatters.
BATTLE MODE OFF
All members gain 831 EXP except AXEM who only gets 12 for being the new 'Wet Blanket'
Smaug (to THRAX): "What manner of person are you? Only a descendant of Xanthur may open this entrance!"
THRAX: "Then I guess it's a lucky thing that Xanthur was my father."
Smaug: "Then, Xanatos you are?"
THRAX: "What if I am?"
Smaug immediately drops to the prostrate position and says, "Please forgive my insolence, my lord! Recognize you I did not!"
Anri: "So then you knew all along how this gate was supposed to open, and you were dicking us around this whole time?"
Smaug begins to squirm where he is knelt, as the party slowly gathers around him. THRAX picks him up, and stuffs his long, flexible dragon body down the shaft of the huge bong in the statue, leaving his head in the globe and his ass sticking in Jesus's face. After the brutal stuffing, flames erupt out of Smaug's nose and through the stem of the bong as he attempts to curse in the Draconian language, but is muffled by the tight quarters.
After sharing a chuckle over the scene, the party enters the portal into the Labyrinth.
AXEM: "Yeah, Trithal, you would know how to put a bong together. You're a master of the bong shit."
TRITHAL: "Yeah... so on that same thread of ideas, you would be the master of being a demi-god on the guitar, while at the same time being an embarrassing whiny bitch!"
THRAX: "And I would be the master of fucking hot, young, possibly underage girls like that one noticibly older chick on the previous season of 'Are you smarter than a fifth-grader'."
Anri: "Would you people shut up?! This is worse than when everyone was talking about my titties and freezing a guy's lips off."
Danika: "Aww, but that was so fu-u-nny. Your cold nature does bad things to guys. Remember when you froze that guys dick off?"
The party disappears into the darkness of the Labyrinth, as we see Smaug working his way out of the bong and onto the ground. He is heard muttering something unintelligible as the scene fades to black.
(END CHAPTER FOUR)
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