The party wakes up super early... and to the surprise of everyone, THRAX actually manages to only sleep in 30 minutes later than everyone else.
After a hearty breakfast, the party loads up the wagon, mounts the horse-lizards, (No! Not like that! You Pervert!) and heads out.
It was only a few short miles from the DragonAle Inn to the mountain trail, so the party reached it rather quickly. THRAX reigned in his mount as they approached the trail.
THRAX: "Alright, guys, this is where things get interesting. The first couple miles of the trail should be relatively easy. However, once we reach the marker of the Dralani, the path will become gradually steeper and more treacherous."
AXEM: "Question: What, exactly, is the Dralani?"
THRAX: "The Dralani? You don't wanna know... but I'll tell you anyway because it's important for you to be aware of what's coming."
THRAX begins his little spiel as the party makes their way up the mountain trail.
THRAX: "The Dralani are basically the Gypsies of the Draconian Society. They are nomadic tribes that wander around the mountains. Most stay farther north, away from the path we are on; but there are some whose encampments are on this trail. We will probably come across at least one tribe on our way to Okremafort. When that happens, let me do the talking. These guys are extremely easy to piss off, and have little to no respect for humans."
TRITHAL: "We'll have to be extra cautious, then. What other types of creatures or people do you think we'll come across on this trail?"
THRAX: "As far as people goes, I don't think we'll run across too many... maybe some of the wandering tribesmen. Our party definitely has the only humans outside of Garr."
Adeth: "So, like, the people at the Inn we were at earlier are, like, the only humans besides us that we will see for a while?"
THRAX: "Yeah, except some of the people there were elves. There might be some humans and/or elves in Okremafort, but I don't think there will be a lot. And, the humans we do come across could very well be Macha, because any other human wouldn't have any business in Okremafort."
AXEM: "Oh yeah! I completely forgot about that! Vankar is gathering the Macha there as well!"
TRITHAL: "Yes, that will definitely be interesting to see who responds to Vankar's invitation... and to see what exactly he has planned for the Macha."
Rihac: "It would be even more interesting if Vankar manages to have all the Macha gathered by New Years like he wants. Over the past 1000 years, the Macha have scattered to damn near every corner of the Land of Fantasy. I remember hearing that Macha-Chet and a few other unsavory types were headed somewhere north of Okreman Territory some hundred years ago. I think the place was called the Land of Banidori... or something. If anyone were to respond, I'd put my money on him."
Danika: "I've never heard of that place before. Is that even an official part of the Land of Fantasy?"
TRITHAL: "It doesn't matter if it's 'official' or not. Since it doesn't exist in reality, it's a part of the Land of Fantasy. However, probably due to it's less-than habitable environment, Banidori has always been too chaotic and disorganized to be recognized as an entity. When the people of the Land of Fantasy first started establishing the territories and prefectures, no one from Banidori would step up and take control of that land. Since no one seems to care about what happens there, the rest of the Land of Fantasy has turned a blind eye to Banidori. Of course, that makes it a place of refuge for those who have too many enemies in the Prefectures and Territories."
THRAX: "Yee! Oh, sorry. Jeremy and Evil Ray say 'yee'. We don't because we are too stomp for that bullshit."
Adeth: "So... uh... like... I suppose we'll come across some monsters and fights and stuff at some point?"
THRAX: "Oh, yeah! I almost forgot. Thanks Adeth!"
Adeth: "Yeah, man! Flying monkeys!."
THRAX: "Anyway, yeah... there will be some creatures that you have never even heard of. There will probably be some Mountain Ogres and some Orcs, but mostly we'll run into Dragonetties. They are some sort of genetic off-shoot of the dragons. Basically, they are tiny dragons with feathers instead of scales. They rarely get bigger than two feet tall, and only have a lifespan of about 3 years. Some can get up to 4 years old, but that is even more rare than the ones that reach 2 1/2 ft tall."
Danika: "They sound like cute little things!"
THRAX: "Yeah, they may seem cute, but they are dangerous creatures. There are only two known types in this region of Okreman Territory: Fire Elemental and Earth Elemental. The earth-based Dragonetties are easy. The most advanced ability they have is basically turning soft soil into small chunks of granite and throwing them at their prey. They are pretty easy to beat. It's the FlameDragonetties you have to be careful of."
Anri: "Aren't they the ones who can use their own feathers like fiery spears to impale and scorch enemies?"
THRAX: "Yeah, if we encounter any of those, watch them carefully. They use their feathers as weapons. Whatever species of Dragonetti we encounter, be wary of their talons... for they are sharper than razors and stronger than steel."
Before anyone could say anything else, the party noticed the marker THRAX told them about about 100 ft ahead of them.
THRAX: "Alright, from this point on until we reach the mountain pass in a couple days, keep chatter to a minimum. We need to be as quiet and invisible as possible if we want to get to Okremafort with everyone still alive."
And, with that, the party travels on in relative silence, broken occasionally by the creaks and such from the wagon.
..
......
.........
.....
......
.....
Smilin' Bob: "And that's it. That's all there is for this episode! The party is just moving along not doing much of anything, kinda like a bunch of Catholic monks on a pilgrimage or something... so there's nothing left to narrate. That means there's time fooooorrrr......."
Smilin' Bob: "Yes, Smilin' Bob is so much more talented than I get credit for! I can do so many other things besides limp pecker commercials and narrate that group of losers down there. I can sing! I can dance! I can act, too! And now, I shall perform an excerpt from the classic movie 'Gone with the Wind'....."
----------
Evil Ray: "Shut the fuck up, Bob! We ain't paying you to perform, We're paying you to read!"
Smilin' Bob: "What are you talking about? You ain't paying me at all!"
Evil Ray: "Whatever! This is mine, Jeremy's, and (if he decides to contribute again) Jeremiah's story, not Smilin' Bob's."
Smilin' Bob: "Well, you know what? I QUIT!!! Narrate this stupid story of yours yourself!!"
..........
(footsteps stomping away, door slamming, car burning rubber a'la The Simpsons)
............
........
.......
Evil Ray: "Well shit! Now who's gonna narrate?"
...........
......
...........
.....
...
No comments:
Post a Comment