(As the sun continues to rise from the East, the camera now moves to Ragnarok Island where we see the narrator Smilin' Bob wandering around as if he has nothing to do...)
Well, thanks to my old, slow ass, I completely missed TRITHAL's whole intro! But then again, it's not all my fault... TRITHAL and Danika were all dressed in black and moving around at night. I wouldn't have found them anyway--
(familiar noise in distance)
What the hell is all that noise about..? Wait. THRAX? Is that THRAX? Holy Shit! It is!
Smilin' Bob: "Hey, buddy! What's up?"
THRAX: "Hey Smilin' Bob! I don't mean to be rude but... Narrate or get the hell outa the way!"
Smilin' Bob: "Okay! Okay already! Sheesh!"
BATTLE MODE ON
THRAX (LV 30; 96/99 HP; 81/152 SP; 5936 EXP)
Zombie Whelp breaths Static Breath on THRAX. THRAX manages to dodge most of the the attack, losing only 22 HP.
THRAX casts Aura Blaze. Zombie Whelp loses 253/240 HP. ZW is destroyed. THRAX uses 50 SP and gains 140 EXP.
BATTLE MODE OFF
THRAX (LV 30; 74/99 HP; 31/152 SP; 6076 EXP)
THRAX: "Goddamnit!! That was too close for comfort! (looks at watch)... Shit! I'm late!"
THRAX is seen running down a dark alley, at the end of which he hangs a right...
Smilin' Bob: (panting) "... Damnit, Thrax! Slow down! How am I supposed to narrate with you running like that?"
THRAX: "Sorry, Smilin' Bob! But Anri is waiting! Head to the Sea Serpent Inn. By the time your slow-ass finally gets there, we should be just arriving for dinner!"
Smilin' Bob: "Okay, that works."
Well, folks it's been a year since we last saw our resident HellFire, or any of the other 'Wind Earth Fire Water' party members! I'm not entirely sure what went on because I've only been here a few minutes. So I guess I'll just tell you how my year went...
-----
Smilin' Bob (flashing back): "After everyone split up I decided that I couldn't ask for a better opportunity for a vacation. So I headed to the deep south. (No not Alabama!) There was a place called Paradissimo Bay, near the ocean, that I was told was one of the best vacation spots in all the Land of Fantasy. I stayed there until my money ran out, then hitch-hiked all the way back to Dale Gorge while I waited for Evil Ray to start writing Volume Two, and the party members to start gathering again, so I can start making more money narrating. Since there's absolutely nothing to do in Dale Gorge and none of the party members showed up there after a week or so, I got too bored from waiting and decided to head here to Ragnarok Island, thinking I might run into THRAX or another Quartet member looking for THRAX. I had heard a rumor that he was being spotted here frequently lately. (Plus, this was the closest place to Dale Gorge. I didn't have any money to hitch a ride to Morgura or Tanchi to look for TRITHAL or AXEM.) I got here about two weeks ago. While I waited for THRAX to show up, I've taken a job as an announcer for cock fights to make some quick cash. Now tonight, I had just got off work and was on my way to the hotel when I heard that Evil Ray had already started writing about TRITHAL and Danika in Morgura... then I saw THRAX fighting that Zombie Whelp."
-----
So now you're up to date and here I am at the Sea Serpent Inn waiting for THRAX and Anri...
(standing there being bored... whistling some stupid tune from the 60's... scratching his ass...)
Okay, finally!
Smilin' Bob: "What's up Thrax? How's it goin' Anri?"
THRAX: "Sorry, man. Had to get cleaned up first. It's my fault."
Anri: "Not completely. I was still in the tub when he got home."
Smilin' Bob: "Yeah, that's cool. I've only been waiting a few minutes."
THRAX: "Coolness. Hey Bob! Where's your narrator booth?"
Smilin' Bob: "Oh. Right. It's back at the hotel packed away. I wasn't expecting to need it anytime soon."
THRAX opens up a storage portal and pulls out a little tape recorder and hands it to me...
THRAX: "Here, just sit at a table near us and take notes. You can put them in the story later when you get back to your hotel and pick up your booth."
Smilin' Bob: "Sounds like a plan to me..."
.............
...Okay! Here I am, back in the booth, and I've got my notes ready. Here's what went on at the Sea Serpent Inn:
THRAX walks into the front room of the Sea Serpent Inn, with Anri beside him, of course. They are almost immediately approached by a matre-de type guy...I hope I spelled that right. If not, who cares?
Matre-de, matre d', head waiter, manager, greeter, or whatever, Guy: "Greetings and welcome to the Sea Serpent Inn. I see the two of you brought a guest with you tonight."
THRAX: "Well, yes and no, Raul. You see, we're on an RPG-type quest thingy, or something. He's our narrator, but he doesn't have his narrator booth with him at this moment. Having said that; seat him at a table nearby so he can do narrator type notes an shit later..."
Raul: "Very good, Master Thrax."
So we waited for like, an hour, before finally being seated... ah hell! Screw this! Nothing really interesting went on at all. To be perfectly honest, their conversational topics bored the hell outa me!
Now we see THRAX reading the story so far...
THRAX: "You asshole! No wonder Enzyte fired your ass! If narrators weren't so hard to come by these days, I would fire you!"
Smilin' Bob: "Well, should I just delete this whole episode and start over, Or what?"
THRAX: "Pssh. What would be the point in that? Our small audience has already read all this!"
Jeremy: "Thrax, you should at least smack Bob for saying your conversations were boring!"
THRAX: "I know I should, but we need him too damn badly. Ugh!"
Smilin' Bob: "You guys done yet?"
Jeremy: "Yeah."
THRAX: "I guess. For now, anyway."
Smilin' Bob: "Good to hear! So, Thrax... What's been going on with you this last year?"
THRAX: "Are you Barbara Walters or our narrator? Just hang around a while, and you may get some clues here and there. Pssh!"
Smilin' Bob: "Okay. Fine. Whatever."
Evil Ray: "Hey! That's Trithal's trademark line! Steal someone else's."
Smilin' Bob: "Whatever..."
.....
(sounds of struggle)
.......
Jeremy (narrating): "Well, Evil Ray just climbed into the booth and is kicking Smilin' Bobs face in!"
Smilin' Bob (in a semi-conscious daze): "Well, I guess I deserved that. Everybody has sole rights to their catch phrases... so I guess I need to come up with one of my own. Ow! My whole face hurts!..."
Hey! Who the hell is this guy? Some short little shit-nose kid who looks like some kind of elf-lizard is making a beeline for our little duo... and they're just standing there... No fighting postures? Okay... That's odd...
THRAX: "Would you quit being Chris and start being Smilin' Bob?!? That's just Elric! He's a friend of ours! We met him several months ago. Sheesh!"
Anri: "Yeah, and his great-great-grandfather was pure dragon! AND, his grandfather was an elf! So don't piss him off!"
THRAX: "Hey! We weren't supposed to give that up until a later episode! Damn, woman!"
Anri (giggling): "Oopsies! Sorry!"
THRAX: "Fuck, just end this stupid, pointless episode already!"
Smilin' Bob: "Not until we learn whether or not you had some kind of awakening experience or something!"
Jeremy: "You'll learn all that later! So shut up, and narrate us outa this episode!"
Smilin' Bob: "Okay! Damn! Sorry... (under his breath)... assholes..."
This has been another episode of the continuing saga of Wind Earth Fire Water. Stay tuned for the next episode where we learn whether or not THRAX and Anri have done it.
THRAX: "Goddamnit! Shut up! That's it! This episode is over!"
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